Mystery Sausage 2: Slim Jims – The Essence of Americanism – A Melting Pot of Meat
January 13th, 2011 § 5 Comments
My coworker’s wife packs Slim Jims in his lunch occasionally and he doesn’t care for them so much. His lack of taste is my bounty, though, because he throws them over the cubicle wall to me. I have asked him not to let his wife know his dirty little secret so I can keep getting these. Plus, it’s for his own good. What woman would want to stay with some guy who doesn’t like Slim Jims? I am thinking almost purely of marital harmony here.
Don’t get scared here, but Slim Jims are made of more than one kind of animal. I know, it’s not new. Even the pickled sausage I ate was made from two types of critters. This trend of using poultry as a beef or pork extender embodies some of the core values of American society. The sausage becomes a melting pot of meat, bringing together meats that would be penned separately on the farm. It is a beautiful harmony. It is America. Slim Jims, I salute you.
Tell him to tell his wife to start buying the kind that are flavored with Tabasco.
Good call, Bone. Those are the best. My friend is sharing this with his wife, so hopefully she will see our interchange and start buying those.
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