Ox Penis

October 26, 2015 § Leave a comment

That’s one heck of a penis. And at $9.99 per pound, they sure are proud of it. Proud of that monstrous Ox penis right there in the freezer section, in front of God and everyone.

For goodness sake, would you cover up?

Beef Feet

May 5, 2013 § 1 Comment

beef feetI saw these at the Grand Mart in Centreville, VA, near where I live. I can only imagine people eat these, but I do not know how until I looked online. Apparently you can use these for flavoring other stuff, or for making into soup or stew. It seems like the same idea as putting ham hocks in soup. Good flavor, little meat.

Have you ever eaten beef feet? How do you like to make them?

Rocky Mountain Oysters: Sometimes You Feel Like a Nut

October 20, 2011 § Leave a comment

Buffalo Bistro in Glendale, UT had not only tasty exotic ribs, but also had Rocky Mountain oysters, which, to the uninitiated, are bull testicles. Yes, testes. Nuts. Balls. Man apples.

I opted not to take a nut in my mouth, although I hear they are very tasty. What struck me as funny, though, were the descriptions that read, “Have a ball,” and, “Sometimes you feel like a nut.” I could laugh for days on this type of humor.

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Red Hot Sausage from 7-11

June 21, 2011 § Leave a comment

7-11 is a godsend. That’s why, when I saw this pickled sausage, right next to a Big Mama, I figured I would give it a shot. When I got back to work I was about to open it and dig in when I remembered to lok and see if this one qualifies as a hat trick – three meats in one meal. It sort of does. Beef, mechanically separated chicken, and beef hearts. Yes, BEEF HEARTS. I was a little taken aback.

When I was in college, a roommate and I decided to buy a box of preformed hamburgers. We bought the cheapest box we could find because we needed to reserve some funds for beer and other things students need. They tasted funny so I looked at the label and sure enough they were made with beef hearts. My roommate gladly took my uneaten share of the burgers and I decided to look more closely next time I bought processed meats. Until today, apparently.

Thus, beef hearts are forever off my menu. I don’t eat innards and don’t mind admitting that I am closed minded about this. It’s one of the benefits of being all adulty and stuff. I eat what I want. Sorry, 7-11. No beef hearts for me.

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Barbecued Chicken Feet

January 11, 2011 § Leave a comment

My beautiful girlfriend’s aunt cooked a whole mess of chicken feet for a┬ábirthday party not so long ago. These were baked with barbecue sauce until cooked through. 45 minutes? An hour? I don’t know. I did not try these because BG would never let me kiss her again if I ate a chicken foot. Her cousin tried a couple and said they were mostly fat with little meat. I guess that’s all for bird foot insulation during this cold time of year, but I also guess those poor footless chickens out there don’t really need that chewy, yummy fat anymore.

At any rate, I’m not eating these.

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