Chef’s Cut Buffalo Style Chicken Stick

October 4, 2017 § Leave a comment

Screw you, Buffalo Style Chicken Stick! You taste more like buffalo ass than Buffalo style. This gets a 2/10. Hard to get rid of that ass taste too. The only redeeming quality is that it actually is chicken, so there’s some truth to the labeling. I just wish the label warned about the ass flavor.


Foie Gras

November 2, 2015 § Leave a comment

A very beautiful woman convinced me to try this foie gras recently. I have never liked liver, but what do you say to a hottie with foie gras? Of course I tried it. Tasted like crap. Never again.

But the beautiful woman became my new girlfriend. Yep, I fired the wife last year due to poor performance. That’s why you fire people, right? Anyway. Adieu. Hello, new beautiful girlfriend.

Biscuits and Gravy

March 10, 2011 § Leave a comment

I found frozen biscuits and gravy by Bob Evans in the freezer section of the supermarket, so I decided to try them. I had had a hankering for these for a while, and as much as I was suspicious of them, having come out of a freezer. that just didn’t sit right with me. Overprocessed and frozen foods generally don’t do much for me. But I bought it and resolved to try it.

The biscuits and gravy were surprisingly good for being frozen food, but not quite what I wanted. It brought back memories, though. It reminded me of my youth, working at Shoney’s, when I would split a biscuit and pour delicious, greasy country milk gravy on them. Except what I had from the freezer seemed to have a week’s worth of salt in it. that wasn’t so good, but par for the course in frozen food, from my experience.

My assessment is that, tasty as it was, I will not buy this again. However, I work near a Bob Evans restaurant and would love to have fresh biscuits and gravy. I am getting a bit slobbery just thinking of it now.

Chicken Skewers from Punk’s Backyard Grill

February 1, 2011 § 2 Comments

Beautiful Girlfriend and I went to Punk’s Backyard Grill in Annapolis a while back on the way home from the Maryland Renaissance Festival, where I got the shepherd’s pie. Yes, it was a while ago. I stand guilty as charged of not posting about this in a more timely manner.

Punk’s was okay. It was laid out in a neat way, almost cafeteria style. The customer goes to the register and places an order, gets a number to place on the table and the food is delivered. It’s a little fast food and a little dine-in. I kind of like that setup. The menu was interesting enough, having things like meat skewers served with salads. It wasn’t fast food at all in this respect.

I got the chicken skewers and a salad. I was hoping for some nice grilled, tasty chicken. What I got was chicken slathered with sweet barbecue sauce. It seemed like a cheap trick. No real seasoning to make it taste good and no real embarrassment about the bland sauce. Sure I ate it but I will likely not return. I would rather have a chicken sandwich from a fast food place than have Punk’s chicken again. Maybe the steak skewers are done better. I don’t know.

Brown and Serve Turkey Sausage Recommended by Eric

January 27, 2011 § 3 Comments

My brother swears by these things. He makes breakfast every morning for his kids and often feeds them these. “Carl,” he told me, “get a George Foreman grill and pop these bad boys on there for a few minutes. They are delicious.”

To me they look like little frozen dog turds and I found them rather bland to the palate. I won’t hazard a guess about whether or not they actually taste like dog turds or not, as my taste buds may not be refined enough to detect the difference.

The bottom line is that I am not going to buy a new appliance just to cook mediocre dog turd sausages and likely will not buy these ever again anyway. Turkey shouldn’t be made into sausage, bacon or any other pork-like invention. It’s not surprising that turkey wants to be pork, but let’s not get too crafty with cross-pollination like this. Turkey is turkey and pork is pork and never the twain shall meet, except in my stomach.

Crab Nachos: Made From Spiders of the Deep

January 6, 2011 § Leave a comment

My Beautiful Girlfriend recently ordered crab nachos when we took a day trip down to Solomon’s Island, MD. Sure, it’s on the coast and Maryland folks are generally overly proud of their crabs, but mixing crabs and the beauty of nachos seems like it should be illegal. What I really disliked about these was the flavor of crab. Even loaded down with cheese and jalapeño peppers, the crab essence was still there.

I never warmed up to crabs. They look like spiders of the deep. I don’t eat spiders; why would I eat crabs? I am trying to be open-minded when it comes to trying new stuff but my palate simply has never been a fan of much seafood. At any rate, I have a lot of respect for my girlfriend, so this isn’t a deal-breaker as long as I am never made to eat crab. She’s not like that though. She’s awesome, unlike the crab nachos.

Mystery Sausage 1: Big Mama Pickled Sausage

December 28, 2010 § 2 Comments

My beautiful girlfriend retched a little in her mouth when she saw me buying this on a recent road trip to North Carolina. I say that if you can’t buy questionable sausages at gas stations while on road trips, what does the American flag really stand for?

I opted not to try it in front of her, so when I got home I slit it open and took a bite. Very vinegary, tangy and definitely meaty. I couldn’t make out the chicken or the pork specifically, but it all came together as one unified whole. A frankensausage, to be sure, but a tasty one. Tasty as it was, though, the texture didn’t sit right with me. It was almost grainy. I’m pretty sure I didn’t like that.

I also didn’t like the red color, which didn’t seem to make its way through to the core of the sausage. Does sausage have a core? well, the center, anyway.





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